5 Tips to Help You be a Calm Mom
I have always been a calm and easygoing person, for the most part. I am a go with the flow, roll with the punches, and don't sweat the small stuff type of person and, so far, have been able to keep that attitude now in motherhood.
Have you ever notice that when you are aggitated, annoyed, frustrated, or anxious, your children seem to be the most fussy and whiny and clingy? Our children sense our emotions and, based off the information they are getting from us, act accordingly. This is why it is so important for moms to be calm and happy. Too bad real life is not calm or happy; life is rough and frustrating and if you are a mom it is somehow magnified to the 10th power.
There are days when I am wound tight as a knot and that is when, as a mom, I struggle not only to keep calm, but also with that mom guilt that hits me after I lose my shiz and snap at my husband or one of my kids.
Over the years I have discovered a few things that help me to stay calm throughout the daily toil that is motherhood.
1. Prioritize your alone time.
Up till only a few years ago I spent most of my adult life by myself. I was a single, introverted loner whose idea of a good time was eating dinner at home in front of a movie all alone. After a full day of working around and interacting with other humans I looked forward to my empty home where I could read or watch movies or write page after page in my journal. Now, I come home to a husband and 1-2 children who need attention and I am lucky if I can get any reading done. Not to mention that any writing I do has to be on my phone (blog posts included) so that I can take any spare minute I have and write a few notes down. So I make sure that every day I have some time to myself to sit down, enjoy a cup of hot chocolate, and savor the silence while scrolling through social media. I fill up my cup of calm for the day and am ready for the crazy when it comes. This usually means that I set my alarm 20 to 30 minutes before I have to get the baby up to go to work. This may be counter pointed to my next tip but believe me those minutes awake and alone are well worth the sleep I give up. On the days when, instead of getting up, I choose to sleep or the baby wakes up before me it is a more exhausting day and I can feel my zen slipping away.
2. Get those endorphins
Exercise is so important for everyone; not just mothers. So many diseases and aches and pains, and depressions grow from a sedentary lifestyle. This one is a hard one for me. I am a recovering lazy ass. I could spend hours on the couch watching TV, reading, writing, social media-ing. But I not only feel better after I've gone for a walk or done some pushup or attended an exercise class but also I am more inclined to eat healthier which is another important factor in keeping calm.
3. Sleep
Sleep is the body's time to repair. Mothers are known for their characteristic lack of sleep. While I would usually say to shove off other people's parentinf advise, I will say to take all those kindly people's advise and do your best to sleep when your babies sleep. Even now that my baby is down to only one nap a day. I try to be right there with her sleeping away the afternoons. A tired mom is a grumpy mom and a soon to be snappy and flustered mom.
4. Wear comfy clothes
It's hard to be in a bad mood when you are wearing a soft shirt, sweats, and slippers. Even when you go out to run errands with your toddler in tow. Put on some feel good makeup and get some no-nonsense hairdo but leave on the soft yoga pants and slippers. Similarly, if your jeans and pushup bra are acting up as much as your toddler, your snap fuse will be cut that much shorter.
5. Eat the stupid cookie
Life is too short to deprive yourself of fun food. Everything in moderation and don't sweat the calories; you likely burn off the same amount of calories chasing the toddler around, pulling her out of the laundry basket and bathtub and rushing her to the potty.
How do you keep your "mom calm"?
What are some things that you must do to stay sane and happy?
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